In A Place I Hope No One Will Ever Find

Facing the Impossible

Earlier this day, my dgroup leader, Ate Tina, asked me if I could lead our dgroup this coming friday. it took me hours to reply to her because I'm always afraid to facilitate on my core dgroup. I feel that I'm too young for them to listen to me. I don't have enough knowledge for them to be blessed by my lead. I can't even organized my words when I speak. Ever since I got serious about my personal relationship to God, this is my number one fear. To share Him to others. I was thinking that maybe I should say to Ate Tina that I have other appointments that day so I could skip the responsibility. But my heart is speaking to me that I should submit to my leader. That God blessed me enough specially this week and there's no excuse for me to run away from the responsibility God is equiping me. None at all.

At first, I texted Ate Tina that me and my friends is scheduled to have our dgroup that same day. She said, it's ok she'll just reschedule me the next week after. God blessed me to have the best and most patient dgroup leader in the whole world! But I told her that we can reschedule our dgroup on sunday so I coul attend and lead on friday. Before that, I asked God what should I do with the conflict schedule. Should I submit to my leader and facilitate my core group or be accountable to my friends dgroup? I just realized now as I type this that I forgot to listen and wait for God's answer. I chose to submit to my leader without confriming it to God. Sorry Lord!

So there, as I read my devotion tonight. It's about "Facing the Impossible". I just feel that sobrang sakto siya sa situation and that God is telling me that have no fear. Just like God promised Jerimiah when he doubted his youthfulness and speaking abilities in Jerimiah 1:6-9, He will put His words into my mouth. I shall not fear!

Kung ako lang, it's very impossible to speak with different people specially when they're older than me. Reporting pa nga lang sa school umaabsent ako pag may nakatoka saking report. I really hate public speaking! But God has a promise. And He never breaks His promise! Kung ako lang, I always doubt my capabilities. I may look confident with my friends, but I'm a loser deep inside. But God changes people's heart. Just like how He
changed mine. I can just be a christian who attends church every Sundays and go to bible studies once a week and live a happy life. But that that is not how Jesus demonstrate us how to show love for God. Jesus sacrificed. Not just in the last part of His life. But His whole life. Pwede namang magpakasaya siya for the past 31 years of His life then sa dulo lang siya mahihirapan. But He focused His life on sharing God's love and mercy for us. Just imagine if Jesus did't share God and trained people. Paano kung namatay lang siya for our sins pero di natin alam kung bakit? Kung paano? Kung para saan? That's the reason why Jesus trained people. Imagine if He did not, paano makakarating sa age natin yung Gospel niya?

That is why we are called to speak! We are called to be trained by people, as well as to train people also. Yes, we can reflect our love for God by serving on our local churches, but that is not our real calling. We are called to speak the Gospel. To share about Jesus gift of salvation.

So to everyone there who is afraid to speak just like me. God does not give us the spirit of fear! Hindi naman ikaw ang magsasalita eh. Si God. He'll just use you as an instrument. All you've got to do is to submit and be amused how God will show you how He can change your attitude and capabilities. Just like how He revealed His power to me :)

IN ALL THINGS, GOD SHOULD ALWAYS BE GLORIFIED! :D